Yeah, yeah, yeah....

Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, now I don't want to hear it. In truth several things have kept me away from my blog, most notably my laziness and addiction to Facebook. Alas, here I am and it just seems like now is a good time to give an update.

The last several months: Not much really has changed. I still live in Lancaster City, because my landlord gave me a pretty good deal at least until the house sells. Which brings up another thought. If you are interested in purchasing a fine house within walking distance to Lancaster General Hospital you might want to check out 129 East New Street. I hear it's on the market.

So what's prodded me to write. Aside from all the little jabs and underhanded encouragements would have to be my most recent weekend trip. So here goes...

Friday:
My good friend "The Weave" (also know in camp lore as "The Fastest Man Alive") an I grabbed some stuff, jumped into his Mazda and made the 4 hour trip to Pittsburgh in 5+ hours. Wait, what? Yeah, so apparently there was some big accident that I couldn't find any news stories about which diverted our route from the turnpike onto route 30 westbound. Honestly the view was beautiful, atleast whatever I was awake to see was, but the 18 wheeler in front of us made for a very slow trek across Pennsylvania.
After finally making it to Pittsburgh and my former housemate Bill (and his wife Kate) Shimko's house we made our way back to the Pitt Campus where 9.5 years ago I finished up my Film Studies degree. (9.5 years ago.... Good Lord... that means I graduated from Highschool.... oh snap I don't even want to think about it.) It was great to walk around and see how much the campus has changed and at the same time some of the old favorites. Memories that I'd rather not go into in this environment flooded back to me. I laughed to myself a bunch, mostly because "The Weave" didn't go to school at Pitt so most of the stories wouldn't have made sense to him. We finished off the Campus tour with a stop at Primanti Bros. Which is a Pittsburgh specific uh... sandwich... er meal... er I'm not really sure what to call it other than good and filling. Click onthe name to check it out. After that we headed back to the Shimko's and just hung out until a little after midnight... unless your name is "The Weave" who was crashed out at around 10:30... lightweight.

Saturday:
We came out to Pittsburgh primarily to go to the Pitt vs. Louisville football game but I was able to catch up with some long lost friends at the same time. It was encourageing for me maybe not so much for them I'm not sure. So I ended up getting up at like 7:00 in the a (freakin') m. to meet a friend at a Panera Bread on McKnight road (not a big fan of that name, but that's another story for another day) that I drove past twice before figuring out where it was hiding. Lucky for me I left a bit on the early side (yeah, I can sense your disbelief even as I write this but it happens every once and a while). After a huge mug of hot chocolate and something resembling a raisen, apple bread in muffin form (not so impressive) and an hour and a half of catching up I returned to the Shimko's in time to enjoy some pasta and head over to the stadium for the game.
Our seats were amazing and the crowd around us was hilarious. I remember turning to "The Weave" on more than one occasion, saying welcome to a Pitt sporting event. We sat in the 100 level at the 35 yard line right behind the Pitt Bench. The game was great, a schalacking with chants of "everybody scores" going on around us because well, just about everybody on Pitts team did score. Good stuff. They are in really good shape though the rest of the season is not going to be easy I think I might be making a trip to a bowl game... as long as it's somewhere warm.

I'm also coming to realize that my giftings extend beyond the creative, though I've often relyed on them because the came somewhat naturally. The last several years I have been somewhat running away from that which I feel I was really meant for. Does that involve film? Maybe, it definitely could but that depends on the setting I find myself in. I am relational, yeah, yeah I know we all are to a certain extent, but there are some people who just aren't good at it. I'm feeling pulled back towards youth/yong adult ministry, which in a sense is what I did at camp. I miss it. I miss being a part of peoples lives in such an intense way. That of course is noones fault but my own. Though I'm glad that I've been on the journey I have for the last year specifically because my heart for people, thier hurts, poor decision making and consciquences there of, and desire to see them grow has been enhanced and in a sense recentered.
I'm sitting here writing this, putting it out there, wondering what that next step is. School, job change, life change, signing papers? I don't know. Sometimes starting over and doing what you were really meant to do is as scary as... well something really scary. I'm tired of being scared, I'm tired of feeling trapped, stuck in a rut. I need to get out of Lancaster. I love my family but this place has a cloud hanging over it that is hard to explain to people. It's a mindset that bothers me, a traditionalism that goes far beyond it, something arrogantly legalistic, lacking the grace that God wants to pour out on us. (Well that was a rant). So, here's to planning the next steps... I leave you with this...

Father of lies, coming to steal, kill and destroy
All my hopes of being good enough
I hear him saying cursed are the ones who can't abide

He´s right, hallelujah, he´s right
The devil is preaching the song of the redeemed
That I am cursed and gone astray
I cannot gain salvation
Embracing accusation

Could the father of lies be telling the truth of
God to me tonight?
That if the penalty of sin is death, then death is mine
I hear him saying, cursed are the ones who can't abide

The devil´s singing over me an age old song
That I am cursed and gone astray
Singing the first verse so conveniently over me
He´s forgotten the refrain.
JESUS SAVES!!!

Shane and Shane - Embracing Accusations